boys will be boys and girls will be girls.
there is nothing that you can do to change this very fact.
and as much as i'd want to disagree, i can not.
and as much as it is a dissappointment. i must deal with it.
so i'm going to do exactly what i was doing the past few weeks and say
.FUCK IT.
once again i don't know why i fell back for a day.
i don't know why i sympathized
i don't know why i listened
i don't know why i let myself care
i don't know why i acted like shit was cool
i am fucking retarded.
a day was bad enough for me to fall back like that.
jesus christ.


thinking about you makes my head hurt. and talking to you adds stress that doesn't even exist in my present. and the thought about you just makes shit so fucking inconvenient.


i know what you're doing. i'm not a dumb bitch. i don't care what you're doing. just stop talking to me and acting like you're still so in love. i don't believe half the shit you say. and when i bring myself to believe it, i always take a step back, analyze the situation and think to myself "why the fuck did i believe that again?". you are a conieving manipulative guilt tripping childish BOY. get the fuck out of here. and go some where else. seriously. live your life. and let me live mine. please. please. please. stop making me feel sorry for you and make me care all over again. you know how i am. and you know how to get to me. so fucking stop. shits not right cause at the end of the night i don't really care. i just thought i did.